Reflections of Reality

I have been thinking today about life, love, and relationships. Despite all the books and advice on the subjects, it all boils down to the level of commitment, communication, and willingness to work on the relationship by the two parties involved. I've learn that while love is essential in a relationship, love alone will not sustain a relationship. I've often said that true love is loving someone not 'because' of but 'inspite' of. Many times, we search for and long for the 'high' feeling associated with falling in love. The happy times...the giddy feeling we get when we hear that person's voice...the constant "Baby" and "I love you boo"....and all the cute litte pet names we come up with for our partner.

But what we really need to be looking for is that "unconditional love"....love that is not based on anything superficial and can weather the worst of storms. Everyday in a relationship will not be peaches and roses. You must take the good along with the bad. And in my opinion, nobody proves their love when things are going well. True love is found down in the trenches...when you're having a disagreement, or your fall on hard times, or when you discover that Mr. or Mrs. Right isn't so perfect after all. They're human. To me, love is a decision and an action word. Anyone can say that they love you, but how do they display their love? That's what really counts. You have to ask yourself, when the chips are down, we this person still be there loving you.

And if the answer to that question is yes, then you must always keep in mind that love is a 24/7 job. You get out of it what you put into it. Things do not naturally work themselves out or fall into place automatically when you're in a relationship. You and your partner have to be willing to do the work and make the relationship better every day. The minute you start to slack, you will see your relationship change and it's usually not for the better.

Also know that even two people who are perfect for each other still are not perfect people. Therefore, mistakes will be made, but that's when you have to employ forgiveness and move on from there. Let every situation serve as a learning experience and let it be a stepping stone (and not a crutch) in bringing you and your partner even closer together.